Feeling sick

I've got my first post chemo checkup on Thursday morning and I'm feeling so scared, anxious, and nervous and quite frankly I feel like I'm going to throw up. I need Thursday to hurry up and come and be over with. I'm hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst. In all honesty I'm thinking its not going to be good news, but that could just be the pessimist in me. I keep praying that I'll be ok, that everthing will work out right. I really dont want to have to have more chemo, but I will definately continue to fight if needs be.

We are planning to hit the carnival and fireworks on Saturday in Wilmington, should be a good time. And come Saturday, I'm either going to need some serious cheering up or celebrating. I hope its celebrating.

We went to my cousins wedding on Sunday, she made such a beautiful bride. Grace had so much fun dancing and eating and clapping and cheering. She also got to play with my cousins little girl who is just a couple months older than she is.

Is it Thursday yet? I wish I could just sleep til then, oh God my stomach is doing flips and I feel so sick. I hope its not like this all the time. I hope it gets a little easier with each check up.

Be well....