Oh daddy, it's fathers day and no amount of sticking my head in the sand could make that change, or allow me to hide. I couldn't even buy cards for my brothers, no matter how hard I tried and no matter how much I wanted to, because the uncle cards were placed next to the grandpa cards and on the other side was the dad cards. I would cry everytime I tried because I just wanted to be buying you one. It just hurt too much to even be near the cards. 

Grace misses you tons too. She talks about how you're in heaven and that she wants you to come home now, but I keep telling her you can't come back now, that once you go to heaven you probably don't want to come back anymore. Because once you get there it's so beautiful and you are finally free from all the pain that you were experiencing while you were alive. And really as much as you loved all us, why would you want to come back?

I would almost rather be angry than sad because sad hurts too much. It just plain sucks because I hate wanting to cry. Specially as much as I have since you died. 

And poor, sweet Scott has been ignored today, and has taken it with grace and dealt with it. And he's such a good father, and a good husband. I'm lucky and Grace is lucky,